There Are More Bullies Than Not

What are forms of bullying? What are the effects of bullying?

Bullying is the deliberate and repeated abuse of power that intends to cause harm. It is the continuous attempt to remove power from another. It takes place between genders and ages, families, friends, and strangers, in the home, workplace, and community, and across all social classes, ethnicities, and cultures.

There are many effects and consequences of bullying because it takes many forms: physical, verbal, psychological, emotional, or cyber and social media and there are a wide variety of perpetrators and victims. It can lead a person or an entire group to become extremely uncomfortable and stressed. Bullying leads to discrimination and prejudice, wars and suicide. Specific indicators of bullying and abuse include victims becoming withdrawn and miserable. Specifically in individuals, there could be changes in people’s habits and routines. Their academic and work performances may worsen and their moods will differ. At the same time, many of these signs can also be exhibited in the bullies themselves.   

How can the person being bullied be supported?

Use your instincts and watch for certain indicators. If a person being bullying initiates confides their troubles in you believe what the person says and listen without interruption. Do not give examples about how you were able to deal with bullying – just simply give ‘mms’ and ‘I see’ while attentively paying attention and acknowledging their feelings. Let the person know that they are not alone and reassure that he or she is not the problem. Report the incident if it is happening to a child and encourage an adult to do the same. Violence and bullying cannot be tolerated. Be sure to use assertive behavior when alerting those in charge. Be a role model for taking a stance against bullying. In the future, conduct role plays with the person to deal with different potential scenarios and explain and teach to others that it is OK to take a stance against bullying as well.

How can we support the one who is bullying?

Bullying is serious criminal offense represented as harassment, discrimination, and violence amongst others. There are laws against these social conflicts with zero tolerance policies in schools, government, and work places. At the same time, competition and violence are romanticized throughout culture and the media. Aggressive behavior is a characteristic of many and there are ways to educate people to change.

There are more bullies than not.

To prevent another from bullying, develop and follow clear and consistent rules and policies against it. Share concerns with parents and teachers if the bully is a child and the HR representative if it is an employee matter. It is important to work together with others to send clear and positive messages and get professional support. Praise and reinforce those who have bullied in the past and have changed themselves to have a more positive demeanor. In the case of children use non-physical, non-hostile consequences for rule violations and clear reprimands within personnel notes for employees. Give more concentration and supervision to those who are bullying and be mindful of their activities and friends. A great idea is to build on people’s talents and encourage pro-social activities and non-violent sports.

How can a ‘Zero Tolerance Policy Against Bullying’ be successful?  

It is important that a school or workplace identifies themselves as a ‘safe zone’ for all stakeholders. There has to be involvement from all involved that there are policies in place to manage various social conflicts. There are routines and procedures in place to monitor both pre and post measures to present violence including increased monitoring and supporting. Workshops and conferences should be instituted and targeted to various staff, employees, managers, students, etc to help shape and foster positive attitudes and perceptions. The entire culture of the school should be involved in preventing bullying and safe reporting with no fear of termination or retaliation.

Most importantly – be a great role model.